Have you ever been nervously driving in your car and suddenly realised you were surrounded by bearded chickens with stares of disdain? Few people have, but this phobia is climbing the charts among compound fears. It’s known as:
Alektropogonoamaxophobia — the fear of chickens with beards in cars.
Looking like something out of a surreal ZZ Top music clip, the fear manifests when raging roosters and hateful hens — sporting well-maintained beards of questionable length — spawn inexplicably inside a car’s interior. More often than not, their appearance is foretold by a dark, stormy night, empty streets, and a strong KFC scent in the air.
It should be pointed out that the roosters have the more impressive beards, being better equipped with larger combs for facial maintenance.
My only suggestion for managing such a fear is to carry a glove compartment full of wheat or chook pellets to appease the nocturnal, bearded freaks of vehicular infestation.